Tales of a Beautiful Life: 1 Month

wait a second.....how on earth did this happen.....how in the WORLD is it already wednesday again!?!?!?!?!?!? i'm dying about it. this week FLEW.

i love you guys. oh, thank you for being the best family in the entire world. i'm so blessed to have you all. i'm so blessed that we are so close...and i hope you know how much i love and appreciate you all. i just really do. i just wish i could sit and talk to you every night and tell you how great my day was. i was talking to a girl the other night and we just both looked at each other and said, "I JUST MISS MY FAMILY!!!!!!!" so thanks for being the best ever.

another great week. oh, and did i mention this is my ONE MONTH MARK?! can i get a whooo whoooo?! i don't know how this happened, but i guess it did? so i have been celebrating all day. because it's P-DAY, and a one month anniversary of being on a mission :)

sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo i don't really even know where to start! i guess i'll just tell you what the theme of this week has been in my head. i have been thinking so much about being WILLING. let me elaborate. how often do we have things in life that we have to do. like callings, homework, jobs, etc. We do it because we want to...and because we have to. I've been thinking a lot about WILLINGLY succumbing to the Lord's will, and doing things with a willing heart. In Mosiah 3:19 it talks about "yielding to the enticings of the Holy Spirit....[and being] willing to submit [to all] things." That's not just saying we need to do what the Spirit tells us to...but that we need to do it willingly. I have thought about that a lot. it's kind of like the true test of faith. the true test OF LIFE. how willing are we, how willing am I, to yield willingly to the enticings of the Spirit? I have thought a lot about the life of Christ....and how we must follow Him. We follow Him because we love Him. I follow Him, because I love Him. Not only did He die for me....but he did so WILLINGLY. he at any time could have decided he was done.....or he could have done it grudgingly...but he did it all out of his own free will.....and he did it willingly. (do you get the point here hahahah..let me just say WILLINGLY like twelve more times for you). but doesn't that just send shivers down your spine.....that He was so willing to die for you? that he was willing to literally suffer to His death for YOU. ohhhhhhhhhhhh the joy. so putting that into perspective for my mission....i want to freely give myself to God. I want to grow in my willingness to serve, my willingness to be the best that i can be, and my willingness to yield to the Spirit. I know that in God's strength, I can do all things. It's actually amazing to think about that- ALL THINGS. the world is at my fingertips........and through the strength of God and the Atonement of Jesus Christ....I can literally do all things. Spiritual thought of the day. Hope you feel uplifted :)

moving along.......this week in IS THAT REALLY NECESSARY:

-i went to the usual sunday night devotional. i waited in a swarm of people for like a really long time.....to get into the room where ushers were pretty much shoving people out because apparantely there weren't any more seats and i was just like....oh nuuuuuuuuuuuhhh uhhhhhhh if i had to wait for an hour to be here...i will stay here. i KNOW that there are two seats in here that you can put my companion and me in. and because of my stubbornness....we got seats :) but we were separated and i was put into a sea of Asians (that is in no way supposed to be racist.....it's just the truth and it gives an added effect to the story). so they all are from Asia (naturally) and none of them speak english that well....because they are all wearing headsets (for translating). so just picture me in this setting. just like literally in the dead center of this group in the middle of the auditorium. And i'm just enjoying the devotional....until i smell literally the WORST SMELL of my life. and i'm just like....what is happening, what is happening, what is happening. and i look around and THEY HAVE ALL TAKEN THEIR SHOES OFF. like..........................no. oh, it was truly awful. like...welcome to America......we don't do that here. so i was really uncomfortable for the rest of that meeting.

-okay another issue that i've run into is that people think that they are literally like freaking opera singers. NO YOU ARE NOT.....you're just not. if you think you are a great singer...chances are....you're probably not which is totally fine, because like i'm not going to act like i am....but you don't need to act like it either! my biggest pet peeve is that everyone sings FULL ON OPERA SONGS EVERY, SINGLE TIME THEY SHOWER. all the showers are like connected, you know? like it's just a big, common bathroom with like five or six showers on both sides. and every time i walk in, or shower, girls are just going to town singing. which may not seem annoying...but it is IN EVERY WAY annoying. just picture yourself wanting to enjoy a nice, hot shower in peace....and all you hear around you is off-key singing. not only that, but it's LOUD. and coming from everyone around you. ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it's just bad.

Another funny incident was that this week we have had SYL days (speak your language). it's just where pretty much no english is allowed. so that's super fun most of the time. anyways. i was talking in ukrainian to some elders in our zone.....and they walked away at the end. and these other elders that had been vacuuming like come up to me and they're like kind of awkwardly smiling and like just being super awkward, in general. and one of them like you could tell wanted to say something to me...and he just goes, "um.....DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....yoooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...speaaaaaaaaaaaaaakkkkk...ennnnnnnnggggggggliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhh??????" like super slowly, and awkwardly. i was literally about to pee my pants. like, first of all it's hilarious because my ukrainian is like not even good......and he seriously thought i was like a foreign missionary. so i just kind of shook my head and quietly said, "eh no." it was pretty great. i just pictured the people of ukraine going, "doooooooooooo.....youuuuuuu....speak......ukkkkkkkkrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaaaaaaannn???" as i'm like trying to talk to them in ukrainian. i can already see it :)

well. to sum things up.....i'm really loving life. I think it's amazing that over the course of the last four weeks....i've learned more than i've probably ever learned. i see things in a completely different way. i see the Gospel in a completely different way. i see myself in a completely different way. i've realized that i'm here to pursue a different part of ME. i've spent my life pursuing the part of myself that i'm not focusing on here. i'm focusing and bettering this part of myself that i don't think i could have discovered in any other way. in fact, i know that i couldn't have discovered it in any other way. i'm so happy that i get to be here. i'm happy that i get to learn so much every, single day. I want to put the same enthusiasm that i have for life, and for my mission, into being a true disciple of Jesus Christ. I want to do everything i can, every day, to be better. to do better. and i can. because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, i can. when i think of the atonement, i think of a bird in a cage......and the bird just being released into the world........being free. that is what the Atonement allows me to do every day. it allows me to be free. free from worries. free from sin. free from heartache. free from loneliness. free from all things holding me back from reaching my full potential. just remember that none of our problems can be TRULY solved without Jesus Christ. they will never be TRULY solved....without Christ.

I love you all. i pray for you all. i think about you all....all the time! i can't wait to send home my letters this week. i have a special something for baby bean :) so that will be fun. keep sending me stuff! but lay off the junk.......unless you want me to look like a fat-so. but seriously, thanks for the packages. my district LOVES you. so much. i love you so much.

oh and also i was walking out of the temple today and a sweet woman was like oh my goodness can i take your picture and send it to your mom?!?!?!?! ummmmmmmmmmmmm YES YOU CAN! so i hope you got that, mom. she was the sweetest. i truly love you all. be expecting things in the mail.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

jazzy/sister wallace